Monday, June 15, 2009

How the Fight Started...

One year, a husband decided to buy his mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas
gift. The next year, he didn't buy her a gift.

When she asked him why, he replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last

And that's how the fight

I asked my wife, 'Where do you want to go for our anniversary?'

It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.

'Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!' she said.

So I suggested, 'How about the kitchen?'

And that's when the fight

I took my wife to a restaurant.
The waiter, for some reason, took my order first!!

'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.'
He said, 'Aren't you worried about the mad cow?'

'Nah, she can order for herself.'

And that's when the fight

My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.
She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 200 in about 3 seconds.'
I bought her a scale.

And then the fight

When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first,
the truck, the car, playing golf '. Always something more important to me.

Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point.

When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors.

I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house.
I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush.
I said, 'When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway.'

The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.


katdish said...

I asked my ex, "What are you thinking about?"

He said, "If I wanted you to know I would be talking."

and that's when the fight started.

(actually, that's when I punched him in the kidneys.)

Helen said...

Bob an I don't really fight. It is hard to fight with a man when he is twitching.

Marni said...


Mrs Adept said...

LOL - too funny.

Maybe I'll be able find some "how the fight started" conversations. I just have to start looking. :)

Wendy said...

Helen - He should twitch. You're Hungarian. The words "Yes dear" should always be ready to come out of his mouth.

bman said...

Ha! What? Are all the men afraid to comment on here?

These are hilarious.