Wednesday, August 12, 2009

The Stars at Night, Are Big and Bright...

I miss Helen. I just had to get that out of the way. Therefore, I propose that all FOTTSP members be required, by Monkey Butt law, to carry iPhones or BlackBerry's in case of computer failure. You should be required to tweet too, but I don't know if we can quite enforce that...yet.

A buddy sent this along, so I had to share because:

a. We've become slackers and aren't posting here much right now
b. NtG takes shots at Texas all the time, so this is my way of passively agressively getting back at him

TEXAS, ACCORDING TO JEFF FOXWORTHY

If someone in a Home Depot offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Texas

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Texas

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Texas

If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Dallas for the weekend, you may live in Texas

If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Texas

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Texas

If you install security lights on your house and garage,but leave both unlocked, you may live in Texas

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Texas

If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph --you're going 80 and everybody's passing you, you may live in Texas

If you find 60 degrees 'a little chilly,' you may live in Texas


And...did you know:

1. Beaumont to El Paso : 742 miles

2. Beaumont to Chicago : 770 miles

3. El Paso is closer to California than to Dallas

4. Dr Pepper was invented in Waco in 1885. There is no period in Dr Pepper

5. The State Mascot is the Armadillo (an interesting bit of trivia about the armadillo is they always have four babies. They have one egg, which splits into four, and they either have four males or four females)

Now let's all start contributing here again before I'm forced to post the official Cowboy Church version of the Ten Commandments.

7 comments:

sherri said...

Helen's silence is deafening!

I miss her too.

I don't know about Texans though...the jury's still out.

I didn't realize Dr Pepper had no period. Thanks for that informative piece of information Marni. I'm gonna' use it on some friends and look really smart. I'll follow it up with the armidillo fact. Maybe you could continue to post useless info that will make us all look really smart until someone else posts something.
Or maybe Helen will return soon and save us all from your cowboy church ten commandment post.

Thanks for your contribution. It takes a village, you know.

Beth said...

I miss Helen, too! Waaaaaaa!

Richard said...

Texas is amazing! I miss it!

katdish said...

Sniff, sniff...

I miss Helen too! Curse you Apple computers!

And wait...

You mean everyone doesn't measure distance in hours? Who knew?

Candy said...

Can Waco tell me what 10-2-6 means on the Dr Pepper bottle cuz that always bugged me. I'll bet Helen knows. I miss her too. I thought Apples never crashed?

Stacey said...

LOL! That was pretty good. Guess I need to learn how to use those jumper cables...

Candace, the 10-2-4 thing is from an old slogan encouraging people to have a Dr Pepper at 10:00, 2:00 and 4:00. I consider myself an addict, but even I don't have that much in a day!

Helen said...

I miss you guys,too. I don't think I could afford a blueberry, especially after shelling out to fix the Apple that hasn't come home yet.
I have been busily preparing it's shrine (aka my desk), organizing it and polishing it in preparation for the blessed day...
If Dr Pepper NEVER had a period, probably a male doctor....Yeah, that was my first thought when reading that Dr Pepper has no period.