Since Nick brought it up...

Yes ladies, the product you've all been waiting for is here!

Sorry/you're welcome.

Special thanks to Steph at the Red Clay Diaries

So I was looking for a video response to a comment Steph made on my blog (See the comment and response here) and found a treasure trove of videos that must find their home here. I'm gonna ration them out, butt here is the first installment.

Google Analytics: Keyword Search

Here they are people. The top 13 (there's only 13) keyword searches that landed people on this blog:

13) nick only monkey butt
12) xrate mike rowe
11) nick's monkey butt
10) little old man from sydney
9) japanese trash katdish
8) fellowship of the traveling pants
7) fellowship of the traveling smartypants
6) does nick have a monkey butt
5) cremation, anyone?
4) clever comment
3) clayton mcdonald film
2) clayton mcdonald
1) "nick's monkey butt"

For the record, I did NOT google xrate mike rowe, and I may or may not have googled nick's monkey butt, but I only may or may not have done it once (twice, tops). And to the jerk that googled "japanese trash katdish", I'm only half Japanese, so up yours!

Speaking of Butts....

I wasn't going to post this because it is tasteless. But then, after viewing NICK'S MONKEY BUTT over and over, I decided that this is an improvement.


Two women went out to have a drink. They ended up having a few too many and started stumbling home around 2am. Halfway home, both of them had to use the bathroom worse then they ever had in their lives. The only secluded place nearby was a graveyard, so they decided to make the best of it. One woman relieved herself, used her underwear as toilet paper and threw them into the bushes. The other woman didn't want to leave her panties, so after she relieved herself she grabbed a piece of cloth from a nearby grave and used it. They continued on their way home.

The next day, the women's husbands were talking. The first husband says, "I think my wife is having an affair. Last night she came home drunk with no underwear on." The second husband says, "You think that's bad? Last night my wife came home drunk with a ribbon on her butt that said, 'We'll Never Forget You!'"

SINCE I CAN'T BEAT HIM, HERE IT IS, THE LATEST INSTALLMENT OF NICK'S MONKEY BUTT! THERE YOU ARE NICK! SHOW OFF YOUR STUFF TO ANYONE WHO WANTS TO SEE IT! SEE IF I CARE ANYMORE. I AM LEAVING NOW TO GO LOOK FOR A LIFE! I KNOW I LEFT ONE SOMEWHERE~!



Monkey Butts, Monkey Butts whatcha gonna do? Whatcha gonna do when they come for you?



Lego Monkey Butt, he's moving on up.

The monkeys have joined the alliance

It seems monkeys don't buy the genetic relationship argument and have gone ape over the animal rebellion. Here is secret footage of the monkey ninja training camp. They have secured a human hostage who is brootalized (spelled that intentionally because it is more cool that way). The rest of the video is cut off because of the violence.

Why Helen Does the Salsa in the Produce Aisle